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4 Drive-Thru Meals That Won’t Make You Look Pregnant and Will Grow a Money Tree :)

So you decided you want to lose a few pounds after wondering if you were pregnant the last time you looked in the mirror, but you don’t want to cook because you have better things to do like watch cat videos? You are not alone, the government is watching your every move through your iPhone camera and they really think you should shed a few pounds too.  The best part of losing weight is you literally only have to eat less calories, so you can still eat all the same shit you already eat – just less of it.  The first 3 days will be difficult, but after you body adjusts to eating less, after about a week, you will fell satisfied with a smaller meal.

Instead of spending $7 on a #1 with a medium fry, you can save money by spending less on food so you can spend it on weird stuff from ebay to upgrade your janky machines. If you want to plant your own personal money tree, you can invest that saved money into the stock market, which I will explain an upcoming article.

Here are 4 fast food options for you to spend significantly less money and also lose weight:

McDonald’s (530 calories):   Cheeseburger (300 cal), Small Fry (230 cal), Diet Coke (0 cal)

This 530 calorie meal is an old classic, sometimes referred to as the “Cheeseburger All-American Meal” it comes in ~$3 depending on location and how you order it. The McDouble (380 cal) is also a good choice if you are extra hungry from digging a giant hole to store all you money you are going to save.

 

Burger King (620 calories):   10 piece nugget (430 cal), 1x Barbecue sauce (40 cal), value onion ring (150 cal), Diet Coke (0 cal)

Burger King has my favorite barbecue sauce so I usually go with the 10 piece nugget at this one, barbecue sauce can be exchanged for ketchup (10 cal/oz) but stay away from the other sauces/dressings as they have up to 150 calories/oz. This meal should come in around ~$4

 

Little Caesars (560 calories):  2 slices of Hot-n-Ready pepperoni pizza (280 cal/slice), Diet whatever (0 cal)

This is by far going to be the cheapest meal you can get considering you get 4 meals for $5 that is only $1.25/meal plus since you’re at home you can drink a diet soda that you bought in a bulk at the store for ~$.33.  A few minutes in a toaster oven will make your refrigerated leftovers better than the original.

 

Taco Bell (510 calories):  3 crunchy tacos (170 cal/each), Diet soda (0 cal)

This one is a little expensive, but it is one of my favorites and it seems to be the fastest thing they can make at Taco Bell. It can be ordered as the #8 for a little over $5 or if you go during their “happy hour” 2pm-5pm order separately and it will be ~$1 less.

 

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Matt Martin
The only person insane enough to make a stupid website like this.

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